Posted

Jul 21st 2009

Mood

Scared

Music

Circles - Holly Wood Undead

Alright, so me an my family we have started this whole "work over" on the body and health.
I am scared of what may become of me.
I am not exactly one of the "lean" an "sexy" girls, though I am sure if I were made that way, I'd flaunt it!
But, what will happen if I lose weight?

I asked my brother on his views, he said I will look funny, his opinion is held in high regard by me, becuase he wont lie to me, and I am very close too him. He touched my chin and asked me to smile, I did, and he laughed.. I said "My nose and chin basically meet up huh?" He laughed and said, "You have no idea."

Yeh I've gotten that same comment from my friends at home, but I really don't care what they say about it (nose and chin basically meeting). I am me, but as soon as my brother said that! I paused and thought. What if he is right? What if I do look funny?
Of course I wanna loose the weight but, at what cost?

My goal is to be 135-155lbs, that's the ideal weight for my height (which is 5 feet 5 inches), I am not overly large, but then I am not small at all. I am obese for my height (so said the doctor, she even said that about my sister who's small)..

I am just plain scared, I'd look old an haggard >____>; I wanna be full an voluptuous! I like all shapes and sizes, but maybe being "lean" and "in shape" would not fit me?

I need to do this though, for my health, in the case, that I am at risk from both sides of the family, of:
-Heart Attack
-Stroke
-Heart Disease
-Cancer
and
-Diabetes

What do you think, should I go through with it, and also is my reason for being afraid an very invalid one?

Vi
Signing out~