Posted

Oct 17th 2007

Mood

Frustrated

So two days ago I got my new contact lenses.

They are tiny as hell, and it still bothers me... I am so afraid of losing them:




I went to the eye doctor, and FINALLY they had them ready and they had the perfect shape for my crappy eyes.

This time, however, the doctor decided to be nice and put a few drops on each eye to reduce my sensibility. After like 10 minutes of trying to make them go in, they finally snapped into place, and wow. The difference was extreme. They are less noticeable than the other ones, though with my camera's flash they are seen quite easily:




But an hour after that... holy shit.

I almost cried. These damn things scratch my eye, but hopefully soon my eyes will get less sensible.

So yeah, my eyesight improved so damn much. Although I had to close one eye to see the difference. Because, as he told me, the area of my brain that usually works for focusing the things my eyes see is turned off. Many years of having no way of actually focusing makes the eye muscles get lazy and atrophied. So, as he said,

I have to learn to see things from zero.

It is as if all the advance my eyes did when I was young were just thrown away. Now my eyes don't know how to focus, and I have to force them. I don't know if you know what I mean by forcing them, but I think you must have tried it already. It is like when you are looking at lights far off in the distance while it is dark. If you don't look at the light directly, it will be and have a bigger glare to it, but if you actually look at it, it gets smaller and you can see more details around it.

Eh... I don't know if that makes sense, but whatever.

The thing is that I have to literally focus as how you have to manually focus SLR cameras. Y'know, slowly turning the lense ring to one side or another till the focus is perfect?

My eyes do that if I stare at something for like 10 seconds. Instead of focusing in less than half a second, my eye just kinda stays unfocused until the muscle kicks in and it gets clear... and then it gets blurry. I probably will even need therapy to learn to use my eyes properly again, but oh well. What matters is that I get to do things I haven't been able to do since this crappy illness took my eyesight away.

You don't know how much it sucks to know your dad got you a car, and you get all happy thinking "AH I will get the license when I'm 16 and start learning to drive"

That happened to me, but by the time I was ready to learn to drive, my eyes began to get crappy.

It also sucks not being able to look at people in their eyes. I could just see a blur, and it would be a double image. That forced me to use sunglasses.

Also, not being able to go to places by myself or being as independent as I would want to be. It sucks to go to malls and being unable to see things or people clearly.

Anyways, enough ranting. I have been using the lenses for like an hour today, and it is pure hell. Took me like 16 minutes to get em on. It feels as if I had 20 eyelashes deep in my eye scratching. It buuuuurns. Oh well. I can use em for 4 more hours. Then tomorrow I have to use them for 6 hours. Next day 7... you get the idea.

I took them off a few minutes ago, and god, it is so awful. Instead of popping out, they move down under my eye and scratch it. It is so painful. And my eye ends up so red, as you can see here:


But oh well. I guess that's the downside of improving my eyesight. I can live with that.

Oh, and a little Dilbert and Milton update

They have grown quite a bit in the last days, and they didn't mind showing that to Polly:


After this, she probably realized that it won't be fun to bother them as she did before. Yet somehow it seems she is not getting as hissy as before... maybe they shall become friends... eventually

And here's a video of 'em a few days ago, when they went crazy with a little plastic cup full of water