Posted

Jan 26th 2007

Mood

Content

Music

"Aluminum" - Barenaked Ladies

After hearing it for the six-hundredth I'm finally just tired and confused by it.
Why is it Tanya and I have little chance of a future in everybody's eyes?
Has nobody looked at us, seen us, read these journals, talked to us, anything?
Can someone explain to me what has happened to the definition of love?
Why is it that you have to sleep around, flirt with anything that has body heat and date/fail continuously to have any solid knowledge on "love"?
Yes, it does give you life experiences and teach you the rights/wrongs.
But why is it you can't learn these things with one person?
Why can't you be with the person you truly want more than anything (and who truly wants you back!) and learn these lessons.
Look at her and I for an example...
We're learning all of it and nothing has happened to us.
The education of our relationship is developing between us, not a ton of other people.
We don't have a fight and go;
"Oh my god, you know what, I'm having bad vibes about this. I don't know if you're the one but you could be the one. Honestly though, I think I need to explore my options before jumping into anything serious."
I've heard things like that come out of the mouths of people who are over thirty, come on!
You know what's worse?
Most people back that up and say it's logical.
It may be logical for some people but why does it have to apply to Tanya and myself?
When we fight we don't stop speaking to each other, we don't say things we don't mean to the point of walking away.
Do you want to know what happens?
We resolve it.
Is that not the most amazing thing in the world?
You know what that word is, right people? RESOLVE.
We sit, talk, understand, listen, explain and eventually come to a conclusion.
Her and I are doing things some married couples can't even do.
It's because we truly love one another.
I can say I realize this with all honesty at this late hour, I do.
What we have is special, what we have is unique and what we have is real.
She is sixteen (very soon to be seventeen) and I am eighteen and we are madly in love.
Not just obsessive teenager love or "OMFG IM DATIN TEH JOCK" love.
This isn't love out of reason and this isn't a case of high school sweethearts.
We've had to endure over a year of being together long distance.
We are ENGAGED.
I know that's hard for a lot of people to swallow but it's the truth.
But look at how we're handling it...
We're not running off to elope, we're not turning our backs on our elders and disobeying them.
We're using engagement to commit and learn about each other.
Waiting until we've lived together for a bit and she's turned eighteen.
It's called maturity.
Let me ask something else, why do her and I "deserve better"?
I've never understood that.
When two people are in love like her and I are, or in general.
Is it not because they are attracted to each other and want to be with each other?
We are always there for each other, we care for each other, accept each other, support each other, fight for each other, sacrifice for each other, feel pain for each other, forgive each other, yearn for each other, never give up on one another, make each other laugh, make each other feel like we're worth something, make each other smile, comfort each other...how is that not deserving one another?
It comes with the "You should probably explore more options."
Why?
So we can try and fail again and again and again?
Only to "learn our lessons" and then realize "I left him/her behind, I had what I needed right in front of me and I let it go."
Peoplre tell me we're too young.
Says who?
Look at her and I.
Do we really seem like average teenagers to you?
We are the furthest thing from.
So why do we have to fit in the rest of the norm?
Why do we not understand our feelings just because we're under the age of "twenty-six"?
According to someone I know that's the age where women know what they want.
*rolls his eyes*
We are different.
Nothing about us is similar to typical and cliche' teenage relationships.
Look how serious we are, look how secure we are, look how much were fighting for this and working for this.
This isn't all "OOO LOVEY MUSH MUSH EHEHEHEHE AAAAAAA SQUEAL SQUEAL HEART HEART!" for us.
We're actually being serious, we're actually handling this maturely and trying our hardest.
People have this idea that sleeping around, doing drugs, drinking alcohol, dating a million people at once, partying all night and being wild are the only ways to get any fun out of life and that it's the only way for you to discover yourself and know what you want.
Why?
Who made this up?
Which slutty college student concocted this excuse for being a weak human being?
Everyone is different, everyone experiences love differently and some people need that but why does it have to apply for every single person out there, especially those under "twenty-six"?
Why is it that the way Tanya and I feel is naive but if we were in our thirties it'd be real?
Love = no boundries
And for those of you who believe love truly has boundries, I don't care, stop applying it to us.
We're not always going to get along, we're not always going to see eye to eye, we don't have all the same interests and we're both going to make mistakes.
But you know what?

The amount we don't get along is but a star in the universe that is our laughter, happiness and bliss together.

When we don't see eye to eye we always take the time to figure out a reasonable settlement and smile about it.

Our interests are always shared with one another and we have fun exploring new worlds and showing each other new things.

When we make mistakes we *always* work it out.

Never will we be perfect but it doesn't take perfection and a handbook filled with mindsets to know true love.
We are doing things our way and so far that's kept us together fine.
So why is it we should do things the way you would or the way others should in order to work?

I am going to marry this girl, I am going to be by her side, I am going to go through mountains and clouds with her.
We won't give up.
And you know what?
Even if we began to, the other wouldn't.
Deal with it.