Sweet Pain - Chapter 5. Listen to your brother

Sweet Pain - Chapter 5. Listen to your brother

5.

Listen to your brother

“Shouldn’t we join the other’s soon?” I asked, toying with his hair. Minni got a playful look in his eyes before he pushed me around so he could kiss my lips, while I spoke. As he got my words, his expression changed into something else. He frowned at me.

“Why should we?” Benjamin rolled back onto his back, and dragged me along with him, so we both were lying on our backs, watching the clear morning sky as the sun made it brighter every second.

Through the little, or rather huge, window in the ceiling everything was white. It was a usual, but rather quiet morning here in the north. At least it wasn’t raining, and even though the previous day had been really over the top, with its fair share of sunlight, this wasn’t half bad either.

Then another thing struck me. It hadn’t occurred to me before, because I already was sucked up by the beauty and sexuality about his naked chest, but he had indeed been bare-chested on a day when the sun was presented on the sky more than once. What if humans saw him?

“Minni?” I started slowly. The question somehow made me feel embarrassed. It was unnecessary as usual, but I’d like to know. “Wasn’t it a bit reckless to be wearing no shirt yesterday?” He “Hmpf”-ed while a little, smug grin emerged on his lips.

“Why on earth do you wonder about that?” Without a doubt embarrassing. I sighed. “Am I that boring? You need to come up with silly questions like that to fill the time?” He laughed honestly now, and he was laughing at me. That irritated me. Wasn’t I allowed to ask questions without being “silly” now?

“No, you are not boring, in that case you would’ve noticed by now,” I looked away from him, rolling my eyes.

He sighed as well, but he wasn’t mad at me, he was mad at himself. “I am sorry, Ginger!” he said, but my head snapped up. My mind was no longer annoyed.

“Don’t ever call me that!” I snapped almost as fast as my head had done, and ten times fiercer. It wasn’t my name anymore, and I couldn’t explain to myself why I had told him about it in the first place.

“Why?” He asked in a playful tone, not close to the reply I had been expecting. Minni moved his lips down my throat and over my shoulder. He kissed my collarbone and then moved himself down to my breast. Somehow he managed to use his tongue as kind as his lips, and it almost managed to clear my head for thoughts, but just almost.

“Because,” I started, but pushed him away from me gently after half a minute. “It’s not my name anymore. It belongs to my old life.” I clenched my teeth and moved away from him to sit on the edge of the bed. My feet hit the floor with a soft thud. I rested my face on my left fist. It was weird how everything was suddenly left upside down. It wasn’t supposed to be like this with him. I loved him and I needed him, but how could I be so angry with him?

“I am sorry… Ginny!” he said a little hesitant. It made me chuckle. I wasn’t known to be angry a long time. It always wore off after half a minute. Minni placed his arms around me from behind and started to kiss the back of my shoulder. “You really are a mystery to me, young lady,” he teased, and it made me smile by the way he seemed so untouched by our confrontation just now. It also made me annoyed with myself. I was so damn proud all the time.

“Bleagh,” I stuck out my tongue, as Minni dragged me back onto the mattress and stood over me with his arms resting on either side of my head. He leaned in and touched my lips with his. When he was about to lift his head, I grabbed both sides of his head with my hands to keep him there. He smiled mysteriously again, and it made me catch my breath and filled my body with fire. His hands slid under my back to press me to his body again. I stared into his eyes. The red was so red, and it was like I was inspecting the wine before tasting it, which was exactly what I was doing. I took him in, only staring at him. Then he sighed, and his lips were at mine again, as forceful as ever. I closed my eyes, and moved my lips with his. Again his touch sent pure lightning into my skin.

Suddenly someone knocked on the door in the bottom of the stairs, and my head snapped up. In an instant I threw myself around. I grabbed one of the thousand shirts Alice had got me from deep down in one of my drawers with clothes. I swiftly buttoned it up, and called: “What?” to whoever was at the door.

“May I come up?” Edward’s voice was deep, and it made me uncomfortable. I looked at Minni. He shrugged, as if he didn’t care.

“Um, sure,” I said, biting my lower lip. I didn’t know exactly what made me want to run away. Maybe it was embarrassment of being such a slut. At least Minni took the sheet over himself before Edward emerged. If not he, I would’ve died of embarrassment.

Edward walked slowly up the stairs. He looked weary, like he didn’t know what to expect. That made me even more embarrassed, because that was so far from the truth it could possibly be. He knew exactly what was going on up here; his brilliant ability to read minds was the cause of that. It made me curse inside, but I was happy he couldn’t read my mind. That was so convenient. At least he didn’t hear it from my point of view.

“Ginny,” he directed all his attention to me, whom stood before him, with shivering knees and what must have been the most stupid expression on my face. I wanted to slap myself. Snap out of it! I demanded myself. There is nothing to be ashamed of! I was right, and I knew it.

“What, brother?” I relaxed and showed him my cutest smile. His face remained hard, as his eyes examined me, from my face to my feet to my face again.

“Get dressed. We’re going on a hunt. The weather is perfect, and you are much too hungry to skip it this time.” I wished he would stop to tell me what I was or wasn’t. He couldn’t read my mind, so he should stop pretending like he could.

I concentrated to not snap something impolite at him, and smiled instead. “Sure,” I turned to look at Minni. He shrugged and smiled, but he nodded. He looked perfectly at ease. And I could suddenly feel the burn in my throat, and could bet that my eyes were as black as Edward’s at the moment.

I turned to look at my brother again, and noticed his eyes burning into Minni’s. Something about their quiet confrontation irritated me. I sighed and turned my back to them both. My hands ripped up the lowest drawer and took the first pair of jeans they could find. They were black, matching my eyes perfectly. I deliberated with myself if I should change the shirt too, and I would’ve done it in front of Edward just to annoy him, but I didn’t bother. It was nice, and fitted my shape perfectly.

I walked over to Minni and kissed him as passionate as I could possibly manage. I chuckled when I heard Edward’s teeth clench together with a snap, and pulled myself softly away from my beloved with my hands still in his hair.

“Make yourself at home,” I whispered under my breath as I walked away from Minni and over to Edward again. “Shall we?” I smiled delighted, as he rolled his eyes and placed his hand on my back to push me lightly down the stairs and away from Minni.

He kept quiet as we moved ourselves through Rosalie and Emmett’s room. I could feel the cold of his eyes on my back and the burn of my thirst in my throat. It wasn’t easy to decide which one I enjoyed more than the other. It wasn’t before we had closed the door behind us he grabbed my arm and pushed me to the wall where he held me tightly.

“What is it about tormenting me you just love?” He sounded almost desperate, but his stare kept being cold on me. I didn’t know what to answer.

“Your expression,” I answered smugly. “By the way, mind your own business. Why do you care, anyway?”

“I wish I could,” he flashed his teeth. “It’s not like I’m trying to listen to him.” Edward looked more hopeless now than angry. He dragged one hand fiercely through his hair, like he didn’t know what to do or say. “But, Ginny, he isn’t what you think!”

“Sure, he isn’t.” I rolled my eyes and ducked under his arm to walk down the hall and to the other. I was sick of his everlasting attempt to “protect his littlest sister” as he once had phrased it.

“He has this ability. Really, Ginger! Listen–“ I spun around and pointed my finger at him, threatening and angry.

“No, I wont listen! You know what, brother? I. Don’t. Care! I don’t care what special ability he has that could be so dangerous for me. God damn it, Edward. I am a vampire! I’m not some porcelain doll. Would you please stop acting like I am one?” I growled so I was sure the entire house could hear me. I didn’t care! “I love him, Edward, and there’s nothing you or anyone else can do about it! So, please; SHUT UP!”

I screamed with my fists tightened so I could almost feel the nails penetrating my skin. My eyes were closed. It was almost like I could hear the windows vibrate with the volume I’d had on my voice. But it was true; I did love him, and it was too late to go back on that now. It would be better for both of us if he could realize that, and stop being so overprotective about me.

I relaxed, and opened my eyes so I could see his face. He looked like he was in agony. His teeth were clenched, his lips pulled back over them, and his eyes were anywhere but on my face. I was sorry I had to say that to him, but he really annoyed me. He didn’t need or disserve any pity, and I wouldn’t give him any either.

I groaned and walked down the hall away from him. I needed some time off. Somehow I knew this day would be just perfect, especially if everyone was going to “protect me” from the love of my existence.

“Ginny?” Alice voice sang from down the corridor.

“Yes, Alice?” I replied, still tense with annoyance. There she stood, literally jumping from one foot till the other. She seemed so happy, and it infected me instantly. I felt suddenly lighter inside. I ran to her in a second, wondering what she was so happy about. “What is it?” I asked, a smile playing around the edges of my mouth.

When she got the look of my face she jumped up and threw her arms around my neck. She hugged me tightly. It made me chuckle, I still didn’t know what was so great.

“I’m so happy for you, Ginny!” Alice said in my hair, and released me slowly. She kissed my cheek, and then looked at Edward with a face I couldn’t interpret. Either she was mad with him, or she was just weary. I wanted to know, because I was sure it was about me.

“Ginny, why don’t you go down stair to the others? Esme seemed quite worried for you,” Edward said behind me, but I didn’t turn to look at him. He placed on hand on my shoulder, but I shook it off.

“‘Kay,” I said with a suspicious tone and walked down the stairs to the others waiting there. Edward was right. As my foot hit the ground floor, Esme was in front of me, touching my face with her left hand while she grabbed my hand with her right. She smiled as she saw my expression, clearly relieved.

“Oh, darling!” She said as she closed me into a soft hug. She was happy, and that made me happy; happy that she, unlike Edward, didn’t judge me or overprotect me. I couldn’t understand why he would forbid me to have such pleasures when he knew how it was like, no matter how bad influence he meant Minni had on me. That made me mad at him again.

“Was about time, wasn’t it, Ginny?” Emmett laughed like a bear while he scoffed my shoulder. I only smiled. Even though I knew he was making fun of me, it was better being made fun of than being protected from something I didn’t need any protection from. And it was fun. He made me laugh for a change.

Alice danced down the stairs, and took my other hand. Esme still hung onto the other. “Come, let’s hunt,” Alice encouraged us.

“You go,” Carlisle said. “Rosalie, Jasper, Edward, you go too,” Edward walked down the stairs after Alice, but I refused to look at him.

“Sure,” Edward said. I followed the others out the veranda door. Esme and Alice held me between them as we ran through the forest. Esme smiled at me, and hugged me to her side. “Don’t be so hard on him,” she whispered. She referred to Edward, no doubt about it.

“He do mean it good. Don’t blame him; he loves you, and he only want to protect you.” She sounded so wise, so mother-like; it almost annoyed me, because she was right. I sighed.

“I know,” I said, it almost hurt to admit it. “But he is going a little overboard with this, don’t you think?” I looked at her. She sighed too, but recovered her smile ever so fast.

“Yes, I know. But look at it like this; you are his youngest sister, and he read men’s heads all the time, he know what men are thinking, he know what Benjamin is thinking, and I’m not saying anything, I just want you to think about it. It’s not easy for him, and he only wants you the best. So, dear, give him another chance. He deserves it.” I groaned.

“But, that is the point; he is a man, and he knows how wonderful it is to have someone to love. Why doesn’t he want that for me, then? I have stayed up alone every night since I became a vampire, waiting for something I was sure would never come. My life has been meaningless,” Esme and Alice cut in at the same time.

“That is not true!” Esme took my face in her hands again, and slowed down to a stop. “Your life has not been meaningless, Ginny. We all love you. Even if there hasn’t been a man in your life till now, doesn’t mean it’s meaningless. I’m sure you won’t believe me, but there is more to life than sex.” I could hear Alice’ laugh-snort, but Esme shot her a hard look and she shut up. “You know that Edward waited for his Bella in more than 90 years.”

“I can’t possibly imagine anything worse,” I raised an eyebrow and pursed my lips.

“The point is, don’t haste yourself, and don’t be too hard on him. Promise me.” She demanded, and I smiled.

“Sure, mum,” I said with a playful edge. She laughed and kissed my cheek.

“Now, shall we see how fast we can outrun the guys?” She teased and dragged me along as they started running again.

We ran into the boys and Rosalie a few miles from where we had stopped. They were standing in the middle of the forest arguing so loud I was sure you could hear it standing in our living room back at the house. It seemed like Jasper and Edward was on the one team and Rosalie alone on the other. I could’ve bet, even though I knew, what they were arguing about. Jasper seemed to have skipped in on the “protective” side. That irritated me. Jasper, who usually didn’t care much for others personal life was now in deepest, yelling at Rosalie with some fact he claimed was right. She was of course yelling back, and that made me slightly more optimistic.

“No, Edward, Jasper! She has the right to choose whomever she’ll like, okay? Stop babysitting her, for Christ sake.”

“You don’t know him, Rosalie, and neither does she. He is not what he seems, neither personality nor appearance,” was the great answer Jasper came up with. I could hear Rosalie’s snort which probably was followed by eye rolling or glowering. I wanted to kiss her for sticking up for me like that, not her usual behavior, but that didn’t mean I didn’t appreciate it.

We stopped next to them. I wanted to smack the both of the guys. How interfering did they have to become? It was my personal life they were discussing!

“Snap out of it, all of you. I honestly don’t care, but you just have to go on and ruin everything, doesn’t you?” I basically spoke to Edward, but I did blame Jasper too. They hadn’t been expecting me, and my interruption made them quiet.

The guys looked at me. Edward had again that pleading look that made me want me to hug him, but at the same time strangle him. Jasper wasn’t like that. There was nothing about him I wanted to hug or ease. His straight mask was as usual hard and serious, nothing worried or pleading. It was another thing facing him with this, mostly because he didn’t care about me like Edward did. I was more just another allied vampire to Jasper than a sister, but of course it wasn’t always like that. I think he would care if I died, but to take it to that level was a bit over the top at this point.

I moaned, while baring my teeth in desperation.

“Don’t act so bloody protective, Jasper. I know you don’t worry about me, I can see it, and it’s no use trying to use that as an excuse. Now, would everyone just stop smashing their noses down the mash of emotions that’s supposed to be the little I have of a personal life? Please?” I said in one breath, making the last of it sound sharp as shattered glass. I tried to not make it sound pleading; I had to maintain the little self-respect I had left.

“Honestly, Ginny, I personally have no interest in your life, or who you are spending it with, but no less I am your brother, and I wouldn’t like to see you hurt, even though you might not believe me. I just want you to know that this man is not what you may believe he is,”

Jasper didn’t change his facial expression, he didn’t need to. “You have to understand that I know Benjamin, better than most, anyways, and I don’t trust him one second. I would say he is a slippery fish, without sounding completely cliché. I don’t know what lies he may have fed you, but I wouldn’t believe any of it if I were you. He has an ability, a silent one, but significant and traitorous at the same time. I’ll admit I didn’t know about it before Edward told me about it minutes ago, but the funny part is that it doesn’t surprises me. Benjamin has always amazed and irritated me, since the first time I saw him. There has always been something about him I just couldn’t figure out.”

Jasper sounded as if he really believed what he said, and that he honestly tried to help me. One part of me didn’t want to hear him out. I had finally found my soul mate. We were supposed to be together for the rest of… this world, and I didn’t want anything to burst my bobble. Everything seemed so beautiful and perfect, like it hadn’t ever been before. But the other part understood the importance of his words. It made me want to crawl up in the dirt under my feet and cry.

“If you really want to live in oblivion, of course I will not try to stop you. I’m only, as a brother, pointing out the stupidity of such a relationship-.”

“Shut up!” Rosalie’s hiss interrupted him, but she didn’t care. She folded her arms around me. “How dare you speak to her like that? She loves him, Jasper! Can’t you see that?”

After one minute of complete silence Rosalie pursed her lips and glowered at both Jasper and Edward. “How narrow-minded are you two? I don’t know why you have to bother her with this shit. She doesn’t want to hear your lies!” She screamed. I stood frozen with her arms protectively around my shoulders. So many emotions were swirling around in my mind, but at the same time I felt nothing.

Jasper looked at her blankly. He breathed evenly, while pursing his lips and tightening his left hand into a fist. Alice came to stand next to him. She took his fist in her hand to ease him. He suddenly looked at her, desperation in his face. He hugged her to his side, while raising his face to look at us again.

“I’m sorry, Ginny, I didn’t think. Of course you must love him, that’s the effect he has on those like you,” Jasper said, with an expressionless face. Before I could answer him, he and Alice turned and ran off into the forest. I could’ve easily caught up with them, but I was shocked, even my mouth was hanging open. At the same time I could hear Rosalie swearing like an old sailor. I didn’t care; I wanted answers.

I was in front of Edward before a second had passed and grabbed the top of his shirt. “What the hell did he mean with that? What did he mean with ‘those like me’?” I was so angry I couldn’t almost control myself, and the burning in my throat didn’t make it much better. My nails ripped the top of his shirt to threads as I shivered with fury. I had to pretend it was Jaspers throat. If not I would’ve probably ran after him, despite the fact I was burning for knowing what he was talking about.

Edward’s expression showed me he didn’t like the situation much better than me, but I had given him an ultimatum. He wouldn’t back out like Jasper had.

“Benjamin’s ability,” he started hesitant, clearly unsure about how to tell me. That made me anxious. I had judged wrong before. I should’ve listened to him from the beginning. “It isn’t unknown to me. I’ve heard about vampires that could do almost the same as he, only his technique is much different than those I know of. He is a… What should I call it?” he was thinking so hard his eyebrows pulled together. Then he looked at me, with an answer on his lips: “He’s an Illusionist.”