OH GOD MY EYE MY AUUUUUUUUUGRUUUUUUUUGH

This is based off of a story I wrote.

SO THIS YEAR I WAS ON A WRESTLING TEAM RIGHTO?

WELL WE WEAR SPANDEX, ALL OVER MY BODY TO PREVENT WIND RESISTANCE I GUESS.

I HAD DONE REALLY GOOD ALL YEAR AND NOW IT WAS TIME TO GO TO STATE. WE WERE ON THE BUS AND GOING TO IOWA WHEN I REALIZED "OH SHIT I FORGOT MY NUTCUP." MY FRIEND OFFERRED ME HIS BUT I COULDN'T USE IT BECAUSE MY PENIS IS TO BIG FOR IT TO HOLD. SO I WOULD HAVE TO GO WITHOUT A NUTCUP AND PRAY I WASN'T HEADBUTTED IN THE CROTCH.

OKAY, SO NOW BEGINS THE MATCH.
I LOOK INTO THE CROWD AND SEE MY SUPER HOT ENGLISH TEACHER. SHE IS BOUNCING AROUND CHEERING. MY EYES SPOT HER BOOBAGE BEING FLUNG AROUND EVERYWHERE. A SINGLE DROP OF SWEAT FALLS FROM MY EYE. I TRY TO THINK ABOUT POLITICIANS, HEAD LICE, SHOES, BUT NOTHING COULD HOLD BACK MY GIGANTIC BONER.

AND IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT THE GUY I WAS FIGHTING WAS TRYING TO PIN ME BY PUTTING HIS FACE TO MY PENIS.
I GOUGED HIS EYE OUT IN FRONT OF THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE.