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"Thoughts Of A Dying Mind" - Mental Breakdown Poetry.
The Cake One:
Sometimes, I like to think of mind as a cake.
Multilayered, and filled with creamy, gooey insides.
However, this is not a normal cake,
The icing has gone stale,
And the creamy inside has long gone rotten
The exterior screams "normal"
But the inside's screams are muffled
Not by the cake
But by society.
Until one day
The cake will die
And be disregarded as a failure.
Good luck with yours.
x.
Second Poem (Which I Actually Did First. I Prefer This Order).
I'm slowly losing my mind
You'd think I'm lying, but I think you'll find
Rationality was never a good friend of mine
He said "fuck you", and left me, fine,
Coherency took its bags and left
And emotions left until of them i was bereft.
You might think this is a poem,
But to me, its the words of a dying mind.
x.
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Comments
ZiggyBuggy Says:
I love the second one. To be honest, I'm not even sure why, I just do.
Different phrases just stick out to me and it's quite rare that so many stick out to me from just one (short) poem.
So.
Uhh.
Yeah. Your mind might have gone for a bit of a holiday, but at least it made a good poem.
Byte Says:
Never be sorry for being a person.
The second one, yes it really was the better one. I think because it feels like its telling a story. Kind of like, relieving the burden of one's life. The cake one seemed so un-serious, half-jokingly, half-seriously crying in despair from beneath a jester's facade.
Also, its "amirite", not "amiright". Getitright or lurk moar.
Hang in there, just live life one day at a time.
cheese Says:
i love the last lines of both of them they made me laugh so much! but also i gotta say my own cake exploded at the thoughts of its insides screaming. thus i have gooey lemon slices everywhere inside my head... gooooooooooooey
Prototype Says:
Good luck with that. I'd say more, but talking through a message board has always seemed too impersonal for my tastes on such a subject, so I'll just catch you next time on MSN.
Allaeriel Says:
THE CAKE IS A LIE!