Half A Dozen Lashes

by WildBlueSun

in Completed Works

Half A Dozen Lashes

With a snap and a flick, Crack!
Rip me open.
With a snap and a flick, Crack!
Scar me for life.
With a snap and a flick, Crack!
Reduce me to tears.
With a snap and a flick, Crack!
Try to change the unchanging.
With a snap and a flick, Crack!
Tell me you love me.
With a snap and a flick, Crack!
It’s over.

Half a dozen lashes of the tongue.

Description

A re-post after much appreciated critique from .

New and improved angst - now with deviant capitalisation!

Preview image © costumeholidayhouse.com
Text © me

The original poem, now moved to WIPs, can be found here.

Comments

Shoku Says:

I can tell that it's different, but it still has the same effect on me.

Nanook Says:

My icon has graced this page a second time.
I do like this new version, though.

Smiling Devil Says:

I like this one better^^ good job^^.